


the greatest loss (is what dies within us when we live)

by WindsOfDracarys



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Gen, clarke and madi is the most important thing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-01
Updated: 2018-07-01
Packaged: 2019-05-31 20:42:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15127439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WindsOfDracarys/pseuds/WindsOfDracarys
Summary: The color of the blood splattered on the ground was black, but all Clarke could see was red.In which Octavia is dead, and Blodreina is all that is left.





	the greatest loss (is what dies within us when we live)

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on my phone, so there's probably 12162872817 mistakes.

The color of the blood splattered on the ground was black, but all Clarke could see was red.

 

Someone was screaming.

Perhaps it was her, but the sound was so raw and desperate that she wouldn’t be able to recognize herself, even if it was.

 

_Let me through, let go of me—_

Octavia’s – no, Blodreina’s – eyes were on her now, drinking in the sight of her as she fought against her restraints. Her hand hung lazily by her side, and her eyes were as dark as the blood staining her clothes.

 

Somewhere to her left, Bellamy was screaming too, his voice pained beyond anything Clarke had ever heard.

Perhaps he had finally realized what she’d seen what felt like ages ago. That Octavia was dead and buried in the bunker, and that Blodreina was all that was left.

 

And if she hadn’t been, she certainly was now, now that she had crossed all lines and stabbed an innocent child.

Her _fucking_ child.

 

Tears of sadness and of rage were clouding her vision, but even so, she could still see her daughter’s fragile body on the ground, bleeding out.

Dying.

As her blue eyes closed they met Clarke’s, and her mouth was moving, trying to form words and Clarke tried to both nod and shake her head at the same time, tried to reassure her through the action that there was no way she was going to let this be the end.

_Please, I can’t –_

But Madi wasn’t stupid, and Clarke knew it. If she didn’t do anything, and soon, Madi would die and Clarke would’ve finally have lost everything.

 

She tried to push against the grounders holding her back again, and screamed for Madi, and at Octavia, even Bellamy, and at everything and everyone who let this happen.

 

Then Blodreina was moving, away from Madi and towards her.

“You are Wonkru, or you are the enemy”, she said, her voice awfully monotone. “You’re lucky I won’t be killing you too.”

 

 _Please, let me –_ Clarke was sobbing and begging now. She didn’t care if she looked weak, she didn’t care if she looked desperate. In that moment, she certainly didn’t look like a threat to anyone.

There was a blinding pain, and she fell forward, clutching the back of her head where a grounder had hit her.

 

“How could you?”

Bellamy’s cries echoed in her head, mirroring her own. Blodreina merely stared back at him, at the last living Blake.

“She chose to be an enemy. She chose death.”

“She didn’t choose anything, she’s a fucking _child_ , she adored you!” Bellamy screamed back at her, all calm gone.

“What happened to—”

 

Then the rest of his words were drowned out by the unmistakable sound of gunfire.

Blodreina’s eyebrows shot up and she turned, quickly surveying the surrounding area. The distant screaming weren’t quite as distant anymore. The battle was getting closer.

 

And suddenly the forest was moving. Footsteps were approaching rapidly, until a dozen of Wonkru soldiers broke into the clearing.

 

“Blodreina!” someone was shouting, but Clarke’s attention was at the small body on the ground.

Is this the life I promised you? That we’d be happier once my people returned?

 

And Clarke realized something in that moment, as she was lying in the bloodied dirt, looking at her dying daughter. For a moment, there was nothing in her head but broken and worthless apologies.

_I’m sorry, I’m sorry ---_

_I’m sorry for ever thinking that I needed something more, that something was missing. That what we had would be even better when the spaceship finally would come down and the bunker would be freed._

_I’m sorry that I’ve been waiting for something that I always had with you_.

 

She barely registered that the weight on her body was gone.

The soldiers were talking in rushed, panicked voices, and Blodreina was saying something too, posture and expression hardening. Preparing to fight. Whether it was the enemy or her own men, Clarke didn’t know.

“We won’t be able to hold the perimeter for much longer. We need a final push, or we have to retreat.”

The latter suggestion was met with a pointed stare, followed by a snarl.

“Wonkru does not retreat. The valley is ours, and we’re taking it.”

Blodreina swiped her hand over her sword, effectively wiping off the black blood on it.

“And we’re taking it _now_.”

 

In the dying sunlight, it was almost as if she had stolen the last embers of the light, and Blodreina truly looked like a red queen, returned from hell to deliver pain and blood and death upon the damned.

The soldiers whooped in response. The Blodreina chants echoed through the clearing.

 

No one spared a look at the dying girl at her feet.

 

In fact, they seemed to have forgotten all about their prisoners, as Bellamy suddenly appeared at Clarke’s side. When she realized, she quickly turned to him and met his eyes. She saw her own panic and heartbreak reflected in them.

The soldiers moved to stand behind their leader, and Blodreina stared at the two of them, face devoid of any emotion.

“You are enemies of Wonkru. You both died here today.”

The promise of an unwelcome return remained unspoken.

 

And then she was gone, disappeared to lead a people who’d blindly, and gladly follow their leader to their demise.

 

And Clarke was up and running. The sound of Bellamy’s footsteps were close behind.

 

_Please let me save her!_

She fell hard on her knees, and her hands were instantly tearing at the clothes covering the wound, trying to assess the damage.

There was so much blood. She was staring into the abyss, and within seconds, she felt like she was drowning in it.

_Too much, too much, stop stop stop_

 

Bellamy had ripped his shirt, and he was telling her what to do (why was he telling her what to do, and why were her hands shaking so?) and he handed Clarke the fabric (use your head). He was crying too, crying for Madi or his dead sister, she didn’t know.

How they must’ve looked in that moment. If devastation had a face, it would be theirs.

Clarke had had enough of tears, enough of death.

 _Please don’t_ –

Madi’s chest was still rising and falling, and the sign of life was what kept them working. Gave them hope.

(we’re still breathing)

But in the darkness, she looked so small and Clarke’s mind was reeling, memories flashing before her eyes.

 

To a little girl, dancing in a field of flowers.

To a small voice, asking if she could be held in the night.

To her own, singing lullabies by the campfire.

To two tiny hands wrapping around her body.

To the picture of the two of them, a little family, bathing in a clear blue lake, as their laughter filled their ears and their hearts.

To the first time Madi had called her _mom_.

So many memories made, and so many yet to be.

_Please, please –_

 

Somehow the seconds seemed like hours, and minutes like days, but the color in Madi’s face wasn’t gone yet, and she was still warm, and still breathing, and still there.

And then one of her little hands came to squeeze Clarke’s, and the other Bellamy’s, and there they were all covered in blood and dirt, huddled together, and Clarke couldn’t think of _then_ and what if’s, and Clarke couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe –

.

.

.

(She didn’t know how long they sat there on the ground, bathed in her daughter’s blood, surrounded by death.

Long enough for Diyoza to find them.

Clarke didn’t care.)

**Author's Note:**

> This was just a tiny drabble I wanted to write. It will probably not happen exactly like this, but I can see Madi getting really hurt because of Octavia directly or because of something she was ordered by her to do. Also if they kill Madi on the show I’LL RIOT, because I love her and what she adds to the show in terms of new dynamics, and I refuse to accept that most of the Clarke and Madi love happened in a timejump we never got to see. Like hello, I’ll take that spinoff any day.
> 
> Come fangirl with me on Twitter, I need The 100 friends <3 [TheSuperTalks](twitter.com/thesupertalks)


End file.
